And she thanks me….

            Regular readers of this post will recall a recent column where I shared some of Barb’s story (you can check it here: http://umakeadiff.blogspot.ca/2013/04/and-we-wonder-why-homework-is-not-done.html) and remarked about the powerful impact teachers have on the lives of their students.

            In sharing her story with me, Barb has grown in her confidence and desire to be a change agent in the lives of the students she works with. I remain in awe of the strength she has displayed and the challenges she has overcome to reach a stage in her life where she is a respected educator, passionate Mom, and an advocate for the welfare of kids in crisis. In the midst of all this, she took the time to send me a message.

I just wanted you to know I’ll be presenting at Mikisew School for the Youth Conference. I will be sharing my story with Mikisew students. I am sure that you would want to know that u have motivated me by sharing what would be helpful to others, especially the children. That is why we keep doing what we do; we are the voice of the innocent! Thank you again Tom.

And in that last line, I was left stunned. She wants to thank me? No Barb, thank-you! Thanks for taking a bold step and opening yourself up to kids who may be going through some of the same painful experiences you did. Thank you for letting them see the impact of the choices you made and the capacity that exists to rebound from those choices. Thank-you for showing that vulnerability can occur despite the best of intentions and that a teacher can be the best lifeboat in a sea of turmoil. Mostly, thanks for your willingness to be that teacher to the next group of students.

            As we move to the end of another school year and we wonder if we’ll find the reserves to get there, remember the impact you have in and on the lives of the students before you. The change may not happen before your eyes or on the time you have with the student. Plant the seeds of inspiration, remind them of their strengths, nurture them to grow beyond their limitations, and trust that they will come back to the lessons learned.  

A Challenge for Us All - Boston Heroes

            Many of you who know me know I like to run. I run marathons and have completed over forty and have every intention to keep running two a year for as long as my body holds up. One of my most memorable races was the 100^th anniversary run of the Boston Marathon. As I watched the recent events replay on my television I was saddened. The bombs erupting just as runners were completing their last steps, draining their remaining energy stores, and their supporters yelling with every ounce of energy they had left. I recalled that moment of triumph during my own running of the race as I completed the last steps along Boylston. Pure joy was etched on every face around me. To see that taken away and replaced with horror was awful.

            As I watched the various clips I also saw something else. I saw that same joy and encouragement normally reserved for the race completion spring into action to offer assistance to those most hurt. I saw people running towards the explosion not away from it. I saw humanity at its best when someone had tried to reveal its worst. I read a poignant piece by Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) who reminded us through reminding the perpetrators of this act that "the good outnumber you, and we always will."

            On my flight home a runner sat down beside me. I knew this because she had her Boston Marathon jacket on. She shared a little of her experience as she was completing the great race. She was half a mile from completing the race when officials stopped them. The panic set in as various reports were received on various devices and people were completely confused. Bombs at a marathon? As the reality sank in she worried about her husband who was to meet her at the finish line. Fortunately he had moved away and was making his way to the 26-mile marker when the explosions occurred. The joy of the race was taken away from so many. She also spoke of the overwhelming humanity as people came out of their houses to offer items to help runners get warm as the chill set in, or offered a place if they couldn’t get back to their hotel. 

I thought about what ends up being a real challenge in horrific incidents like this one. We want so much to know the truth and who might have perpetrated this heinous act that we use a lot of ink and airtime to publicize their deeds. I understand the importance of exposing evil and putting a name and a face to it. Ultimately it reduces their power and reminds us of the wisdom of Oswalt’s comment. But I want us to learn the names of the heroes just as clearly. I want to know about the courageous acts of the runners and spectators who turned to face danger, the first responders who acted unfailingly to treat the injured without any certainty of the presence or absence of other explosives, the medical teams who worked diligently to save lives, reduce fears, and offer hope.

            Yes, we learn the names of the monsters throughout the history of our existence. Every time the names of those who performed this act are mentioned, there ought to be a ten-fold mention, or publication, of the names of the heroes. It’s a challenge I’m willing to take up. Names like Jessica Sexton, a nurse who sat by a child’s bed for hours after the bombing, or Carl Hauser a trauma surgeon who was on call that day and had to assess the 25 patients brought in and determine need during the 33 hours of the shift he put in, or Eric Goralnick an ER doctor who was one of the first responders at another hospital that treated 31 patients. I want to remember little Martin Richard as no 8 year old should have his life end so tragically moments after embracing his father who had completed the run

As this story continues to unfold and the world hears about another couple of names masking as evil, I hope you’ll also take up the challenge to remember and promote the helpers. They are all around us and deserve far more time in our memory banks than those who set about to create fear.

Seven Reasons to Attend Seven Keys in Seattle

I tweeted out seven reason why I thought educators should come to Seattle May 16/17th and attend a conference facilitated by Charlie Coleman (@Heart_Coleman) and I. We think it will be the type of conference that can really create the positive change in schools that we fell is necessary to move forward and promote positive student outcomes. It's happened whenever we've presented the material and we'd really like to have you join us (http://www.solution-tree.com/authors/tom-hierck/pyramid-behavior-intervention-wsf481.html). Here's the 7 reasons (aligned with the 7 Keys):

Reason #1 Common Expectations will be achieved + you'll create a matrix that describes and defines what you value most at your school.

Reason #2 We'll create positive outcomes that all staff can deliver, model, and explain and all students learn. ALL means ALL!

Reason #3 Positive Reinforcement (4:1) that is authentic + meaningful (personalized) is the goal. EVERY student deserves our respect.

Reason #4 Support strategies will be developed and implemented that allow specialists to max their impact and kids to max their learning.

Reason #5 Collaboration is King! We are infinitely smarter together than we can hope to be individually. Teamwork trumps solo effort.

Reason #6 Data - a good word when used for the right reasons. Should inform our instruction and student learning. The conversation is key.

Reason #7 School-wide approach drives how "we do things around here". What's your rally cry? How is your school defined?

And We Wonder Why the Homework Is Not Done?

     When I get the opportunity to present on the topic of school culture and building relationships I often conclude with a personal story that ties together many of the concepts I've presented over the one or two days. I share my story with the participants neither for their sympathy nor their admiration as it's just a part of who I am. I haven't always been able to share the story and it is still a visceral experience for me but I share it because of the connections it makes for others and the responses I've had shared with me. Of all the moments in this work those are the ones I treasure the most and feel humbled that individuals would share some very personal and heart wrenching stories with me. One of these moments happened recently and Barb took it a step further by inviting me to share her story with others in the hope that it would serve as a reminder to both kids and adults about the infinite possibilities that lurk inside each of us. As you read this make the connection to the title of this post. Here is Barb's story:

     As a child, growing up was hard, we had lived in poverty. I am also a twin, and had lived with my dad and other siblings. With my mother gone and out of our lives, it was hard not knowing who and what she looked like. Our house was known as a party house, where there would be a lot drinking and there would be all sorts of people hanging around all the time. A lot of times I would wake up from under the bed from hiding because of the fighting going on. I would listen for people talking, if it was silent, then I knew that they had left or were passed out, I then would come out of hiding. I was pretty much scared of everyone that came to drink there. A lot of times we'd get hungry due to the fact Dad had drink up the Allowance or Welfare money, which came once a Month. I experienced a lot of negative things during the times when they would come and drink, especially one thing I would not mention that would have a negative impact for the years that followed. At 14, I had dropped out of school because, as a teenager, I thought I didn't need it. I was sure I knew it all.

    At 15, I ran away from home, being tired of everything and everyone, never changing routine at home. I ended up in Thompson, Manitoba, roaming around but I never touched alcohol or even smoked. I'd just do babysitting, in order to get room and board, or even crash with friends. At 17, that's when the hurt and anger surfaced because of my past experiences as a child. I had started to smoke, drink, and do drugs, this was to numb the pain, I was experiencing. The anger I felt was targeted on everyone I met and that got me into a lot of trouble, including jail time.

     At 18, I had my first child Walter and still, I was having a hard time, knowing I had to give him up. Due to the fact I was not educated and what kind of life would he get from a dropout. It made me think back during my time at school or what I vowed before, that's when I had to try and support myself and to try and send money to my son, who I had given up for adoption. I found my first job, as a waitress at Ponton Service Station. I worked there for 2 years. It was okay for awhile then again, my past had resurfaced again. My pain and anger, was due to the fact I couldn't forgive and forget. It was the same routine, using drugs, smoking and drinking, anger that would come with would land me in jail. During my time in jail, I thought of my life and how I messed it up so.

     At 20, I had my second child Precious, and then along came Shawn. This time, I thought about my past, what I went through, reminding myself what kind of life would I be able to give them. I had lived in an apartment building in Thompson, Manitoba. I remembered my times, I had spent hiding under the bed as a child, thinking I would not let my children live and experience what I went through that I would provide for my children and reach my goals I had dreamed of doing and having. 

     A drop out at 14, I would have to start from scratch but I intended to no matter what for my children. At a grade level 6th grade, I started to attend night school at Thompson Friendship Centre. Even though I had a hard time with babysitters I would try my best to attend. When I moved back to Cross Lake, I was accepted to College Preparation level1, which was a promising start. At 25 I attended Brandon Friendship Centre, this time at a grade 10 level. Then came Brandon Adult Learning Centre, which was a grade level of 11 and 12 in one year. After I graduated, I had done 6 grades in a two year span. I had set out a goal, I had always had in me but those things that had happened to me as a child had smothered those dreams I had within.

     Barb is quite a success today. She has a four bedroom house of her own, a vehicle and a skidoo. She works both as an Education Assistant and an On-Call Worker for a local agency. She credits her elementary school teacher, Judy Halcrow, for teaching her to believe there is hope and that dreams can be realized no matter what background you come from. It's a reminder of the amazing capacity we have as educators to light the fire within every student, to help them become the success they were intended to be. The final words go to Barb:

     There are things that will hold you back to accomplish your dreams, if we don't learn to forgive and forget; we will be stuck in that kind of life, the kind of life where we go or run to, to numb our pain within. Today I work in the same field as her and I'm sure she would be happy to know that the love and compassion she had given me has been passed on to so many others and I am sure will live and be passed on for years to come.

     Let's stop wondering why the homework's not done and return to the focus of helping kids become the wild successes they are destined to be.

Pride and Respect

Before taking a mini-break this past week, I had the pleasure of visiting two northern communities in two different provinces. My time in Terrace, British Columbia and Cross Lake, Manitoba provided some great learning for me and both visits were instances where I felt I received more than I provided. In both these situations my learning had a First Nations focus. I am indebted to the young “teachers” who reminded me of the brilliance that resides in all of our students – a brilliance that doesn’t always shine brightly but is evident once a student is given the chance to glow.

I visited Caledonia Secondary as part of a schools tour in advance of an evening presentation I was to give. I had hoped to gain a few insights to connect my session to local context. Within minutes of arriving at the school Vice-Principal Jane Arbuckle and I were talking and she was sharing the great successes of the work the school was doing with their First Nations students. Later she introduced me to Randal Wesley who she described as a talented artist. Her description was very accurate as I stared in awe at one of his nearly competed paintings. Rather than remaining open-mouthed, I took the step to ask him about his work. That’s all it took. He was so proud of his work and so appreciative of being asked to explain it, his thought process in creating it, and what each section meant, that he kept me engaged for the next five minutes. His depiction of the eagle and its personal connection were amazing to listen to. My limited time at the school was the only imposition on our time together.

I was hustling to get back to the main office and engage in some further conversations when Jane let me know that another student, Blake MacMillan, wanted me to see his painting. This was another one of those times where a student request was more pressing than my schedule and I was honored that he wanted me to see his work. Once again, the talent level of this young artist struck me as did his willingness to explain the personal connection the work held for him. When I asked why he chose the blue color for an aspect of the moon he explained that it just came to him and represented a personal context on a traditional portrayal. How we acknowledge this level of skill and capacity for personal connection along with the ability to effectively communicate that information may help to alter our traditional view of school success. The two artists have a clear path to a viable future that will see them enrich the lives of many.

I left Terrace and made the multi-stage flight to Cross Lake, arriving the following morning and being greeted by my very enthusiastic host, Connie McIvor. She was excited to share with me what her students and the students of the other two schools had done to welcome me and help to set the tone for the two days of work I had the pleasure of facilitating with the educators in the area. They had designed posters and narratives built on my theme of “The Heart of Education”. I took photos of all of their work and was so impressed by not only their levels of talent but also their thought processes. This was one of my favorites:

 

The students embraced the notion of role model, motivator, friend, and embracing differences as we build better schools. I was very touched by a number of the personal narratives including this one that spoke to the value and importance of education:

Some very powerful words shared by a middle school student who sees value in her education despite some of the familiar influences that might detract her from reaching her goals. I couldn’t help but be reminded of the significant role all educators play as leaders for positive change that can drastically improve the life chances of students. 

Thanks For the GPS – I Hate My GPS

        Travelling to new places is an amazing aspect of the work I do. The only downside is that I’m terrible with directions and do not possess even a modicum of spatial awareness. (When I run in new places it’s always an out and back to void getting lost.) The best gift I received recently was a GPS. I know there was a reason behind why my wife got it for me. She grew weary of the calls as I was driving down some incorrect road trying to find the hotel I never stayed at previously. It has been a lifesaver, as I get into my rental car and just type in the desired address. I never question the directions “Mandy” provides, and that has become the problem. A recent trip highlighted my dependence. I was pulling into the small town of Santa Nella (population 1,380) and could see the bright sign of the Holiday Inn on my right as I was approaching the lights. Mandy said, “Left turn ahead”. So I turned left and proceeded down a dead-end street arriving at a truck lot. Mandy said, “You have reached your destination” and I’ll be darned if I didn’t think for a moment that I had! Fortunately, logic took over and I reversed my direction and went back to the hotel I initially saw (cursing Mandy all the way, as if that made a difference). A little reflection after getting settled in provided the following insights.

"Turn left….."

        I am not good at directions and need to work on that to get better – it is possible. My lack of comfort is remedied by investing in the directions provided by an authority – even a technology-based one. Since this authority is right more often than not, they get the benefit of the doubt even overriding logic and facts. I am prepared to deny the other senses. When this authority is wrong, it’s still not my fault, as “she” ought to know better (no matter how illogical that sounds). Mandy and I need to work out the kinks in our relationship, and I need to contribute more to it.

The translation to what we do in schools is clear to me. As new changes emerges, it is quickly followed by a request to “get us more information” or “tell us what to do”. We look for the comfort that comes with a defined plan and series of steps. Except when the steps appear to run counter to what we know is best, we run the risk of arriving at the wrong place and having our students also not get to their destination. The best plans are the ones we co-create and own. They are the plans achieved by listening to the wisdom of the ages, the addition of new practice, and the collaboration of brilliant individuals to achieve an even more brilliant collective.

I hate my GPS when it’s wrong, but I need to own the fact that I expected it to be right more than is logical. I need to understand that I’m better at directions than I give myself credit for and that I can override the suggestions by following my own intuition and obvious facts. I also know I can help colleagues overcome the stresses and fears about change and wanting security in things that also might not provide a guaranteed answer. I’m looking forward to my next road trip.

        Now, don’t get me started on my cellphone, which is directly responsible for my loss of ability to remember phone numbers!